When a women decides for In Vitro Fertilization she knows that this is probably her last chance for giving birth to a child. Some of us think we can comprehend how stressful and depressing this can be but really we just can’t. IVF is not a miracle, it is a treatment and as any other treatments it can fail. What should you do then?
Don’t be hasty
Don’t start thinking immediately about going for another try when IVF fails. Give yourself time. You have to understand that this treatment was a huge effort not only for your body but the mind. You need to take your time to recover. Those are not empty words! Experts say that giving yourself time and taking a break from the stress and fatigue can only help you and boost up your chances on the next try. First of all you have to come to terms with the fact that your treatment failed and take a breath, spend time with your family and use their support.
You can also try talking to a counsellor about what you feel and what you really feel you want to do next.
Later you could talk to your clinician about your chances with a next IVF treatment. Depending on what went wrong, should you try the same method? or maybe do something differently. Also what could you do to boost up your chances.
After you get yourself together and recover you should talk to your clinician so he can help you understand what went wrong. It is good for you to know why your treatment was not successful and it will help you to make more conscious decisions in the near future.
The two most often reasons the treatment failed is either because the embryos failed to develop in the womb or the treatment had to be cancelled.
Embryo development failure in the womb.
The embryo failing to develop in the womb is the most often reason of the IVF being unsuccessful. It is never fully clearly obvious why that happens but it could be one of the following:
- The embryo failed to implant in the womb.
It could happen either because the egg did not mature properly or it did not divide as it should after being fertilized, there could also be other reasons.
- Low blood supply in the womb.
The embryos could develop well and be of great quality and still if the blood circulation in your womb is weak the chances of getting pregnant would be smaller and if you got pregnant there’s a higher possibility of miscarriage.
- Embryo with chromosomal disorders.
An embryo may appear healthy but still have faulty chromosomes.
- Treatment cancellation.
This could either occur before egg collection or before the transfer of the embryo to the womb. Either of this could happen if:
- The medication used to stimulate the ovaries and their egg production failed to do so.The ovaries could over respond to the medication causing ovarian hyper-stimulation (OHSS)
- The embryos didn’t develop because the eggs were not fertilized.
- The embryos cannot be transferred to the womb because they failed to develop in the laboratory.There could also be a case were no eggs were collected.
Choose to let it go
After having another try, and another and so on you will finally have to let go. Either it’s because you feel you can’t handle another try emotionally or maybe you don’t have enough money. It also could be a case in which your clinician will tell you that chances are minimal or even zero for you to get pregnant or you simply have enough and you think it is time to let go and get on with your life and make the most of it.
Try other options
When IVF fails giving it up does not necessarily mean you have to give up hope of having a child. There are other options like adoption or surrogacy. Many women which tried IVF several times and their treatments failed firstly abandoned all hope for having kids and decided that it was enough but after some time they started thinking about adoption or surrogacy. Surrogacy however is a lot more expensive unless you have a sister or someone in your family who would be willing to help you and make such a sacrifice. Adoption is also an option, especially when you think about how you could change some child’s fate with love and care. First the thought of not having your own child which you gave birth could be really scary but many women after the adoption thought that that was the best decision. In the end people are great at adapting to new situations. Even if it means supressing our own human instincts.